Homeschooling Without Losing Yourself

5 Tips for the busy mom

When I first started homeschooling not only did I think it meant doing public school at home, I thought it meant pouring all of myself into my children's education. I am talking spending every waking hour dedicated to lessons, projects and planning. But here is what I quickly learned; when we lose ourselves in the process, everyone suffers.

Homeschooling is a calling, but it is not meant to come at the expense of your identity, your health and definitely not your joy. You are not just the "teacher" you are also the mom, the wife, the daughter of the King and a woman with dreams and needs too. When you start to lose your identity you start to let doubt creep in and you start to question yourself, your life and your faith.

Here are five practical (and grace filled) tips to help you homeschool without losing yourself.

Anchor your day in God's word

The absolute best curriculum and planning in the world won't give your family peace if mom is running on empty. Take some time in the morning with your beverage of choice and start your day in prayer and scripture even if it is just a few verses. It will make a difference.

One of my go to reminders is Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." When we start with Him, the day flows from a place of peace rather than panic.

Create a rhythm, not a rigid schedule

As I mentioned when I first started homeschooling I thought I had to spend my day making it look and feel like public school at home. But this thinking is one of the most common ways burnout creeps in. Instead of chasing a perfect hourly schedule, focus on rhythms. Here is an example of a rhythm:

morning: Bible, math, reading

afternoon: history, science, hands on projects

evening: reading and quiet journaling

I want to share our rhythm because it may seem out of the box to some but it could help. Our current rhythm is more based on my children and not the subject. The first ones up in the morning are always the my 3rd and 5th grader. After breakfast we sit down and attack our studies. By the time my teen wakes up I am done with the little two and can focus solely on her. We do this every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Those are the days we school since we have co-op Mondays and Fridays.

You need to find the rhythm that works best for you and you may not find it right away! Trial and error is extremely important here. Finding a rhythm allows you space for flexibility when the baby needs attention, when someone is sick or when a spontaneous field trip opportunity comes up.

Protect "mom time" without guilt

Did you know that rest is not something that is earned? I know right! That is a thought that all us moms struggle with. But guess what, you don't have to earn rest. Whether it is a quiet walk, reading a book or crafting something you love, you must guard your time. Show your children that self care is not selfish, it is a stewardship of the body and mind God gave you.

Finding 15 to 20 minutes a day can refill your cup so you can pour back into your family.

Simplify your curriculum and commitments

I think it is common for homeschool moms to feel like we have to do all the things, sign up for all the things, do all the sports and field trips because of the guilt we have that our children are missing out being home with us and not in public school. But trust me more isn't always better.

It is okay to choose the curriculum that works best for your family and not what the latest Instagram mom says you need and it's okay to say "no" to activities that overload your week or just don't bring you or your kids joy. Remember it is better to do a few things well and with joy than to drag your kids (and yourself) through a mountain of lessons with tears and frustration.

Build a support system

Small story. When we first moved to Texas the girls asked to go to public school for the sole purpose of making friends. I said challenge accepted and instead threw us out there and found us a tribe. Was it scary? Most definitely but I would do absolutely anything for my children and you know what, after being alone for so long I found so much comfort in finding friends for myself.

You do not have to homeschool alone! Whether it is a co-op, a support group, a weekly park play date or just one friend you can call on rough days having a community matters!

Proverbs 27:17 says, "Iron sharpens iron and one man sharpens another." The same is true for moms. We need encouragement from another woman walking the same road and that can give you the strength to keep going.

You are more than enough

Listen, homeschooling is important but you have to remember it is not your only role. You are still you and you are created with purpose and worthy of rest, joy and growth.

Your kids do not need a perfect teacher; they need a present mom who is walking faithfully with the Lord. That begins with giving yourself the same grace you extend to them.